Nuance

So I blog.

Ever feel like imploding?

That uncontrollable urge to just self destruct and start all over?

I have.

Multiple times actually.

But I don’t. Why? Beats me. Maybe I am called to serve a higher purpose or some bullcrap like that even I sometimes don’t believe in.

I think I’ve mentioned multiple times on this blog that life is a series of choices, followed by highs and lows.

I was the intrepid hero in my little history. A resilient little bugger who refuses to life get him down, and continues to uplift himself the best way he knew how. Yup. That was me.

I say WAS because I don’t think I am anymore. Why? I don’t know.

I imagine I am soaring up towards cloud nine. An enviable journey through trials and tribulations that crosses barriers and destroys borders, yup that was what I was feeling.

“I’m breaking new ground here people!”  You would hear me occasionally say.

But just as you almost reach the peak, the ground beneath you is pulled and air let out of your sail and other metaphoric phrases that convey a certain deflation or loss of momentum.

And now I just suck.

Don’t get me wrong. This is not a sad/depressing post. This was actually a wake up call.

Time to run.

Move.

Turtle myself into something or someone I used to be.

So I turn on my iTunes and listen to Fix You.