Conversation w/ Me

Mar 30, 2010 by Chubs    5 Comments    Posted under: Featured Articles, Realizations, The Daily Grind

I was listening to the radio this morning and just before I pulled into the parking space at work a great topic was brought up. If you could have  lunch with the 15-year old version of you, what about your current life would be most surprising? As I sat in my car, it got me thinking of a few things.

I’m sorry if this post won’t be adorned with pictures nor would it contain any aggregated content. (Ok maybe one. Ricky Martin is apparently gay! I think we all figured that out since he came out with She Bangs.) But it is a topic which I think hits very close to home because I stand now at a crossroads in my life. A series of big events in just a span of 3 months really got me started thinking of where I want to be and who I want to be.

If I had a conversation, a lunch, with the 15-year old me, what about my current life would be most surprising and where would we eat?

When I was 15, I had just finished my ugly ugly 1st year of high school and would be in utter despair over having to take summer remedial classes for math. I would have resolved to give up gaming for good (I was ranked 2nd in CS back then) and would focus on school for fear of actually being kicked out of AHS.

But beyond this, I’ve always dreamed of becoming a lawyer. The prestige and respect one commands and is associated with that dream was something the 15 year old me always aspired for. I will tell him that do not worry about being shy and timid. As time goes on, he will relish the pressure and responsibilities and load put on his shoulders. It will give him an opportunity to shine and shine he will.

I will tell him to not worry about what other people think of him right now. I know the insecurity he felt also and will re-assure him that the very same people that judged him back them are the same people who will come to him for help and advise in the future.

I will tell him that although he didn’t push through with law school because of his jaded views, to be not afraid in trekking new ground and to discover his passion. His passion will continue to fuel his everyday life and will recreate a newer and a more fulfilling dream.

But as conversations w/ 15 year old boys go, it inevitably ends in girls. He would ask me how it was looking in terms of girlfriends and girls and I would just smile. I could hear myself snicker as I wink at him and give him signs of approval. I told him he will not be disappointed with the choices he will make. But I told him that despite being happy right now, he will go through tough times and it is during these times that he should find himself and discover what kind of person he really is and/or wants to be. I told him to keep being himself, and remain the hopeless romantic he secretly is. He will blush as I mention this. I’ll tell him stories of some of the sappiest things I’ve done and he will laugh, amused at the thought that he will do it too someday. That’s just because that’s the kind of people we are.

And as we wrap up our conversation and comparison of crushes, I will point out how his taste evolves. No longer are our crushes based on looks but largely on personality. He will be somewhat surprised by this and yet, he will nod his head in acceptance, albeit reluctantly. He has still yet to understand.

As I reach over to give him a quick fist-bump, he will know what it means and as we laugh and finish our meal. As we sop up the last remaining drops of gravy, we quickly raise our hands in unison and gesture to the waiter for extra gravy. We will probably be at Jollibee Greenhills, 2-pc chickenjoy, large coke, extra rice, and extra gravy.

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